because when you think of it, the possibilities are infinite.

i have my accounting and econs notes piling up right in front of me but in my mind im just so distracted i can never study.

just felt like typing.


my mind is so actively thinking of random stuff i cannot seem to control myself.


but, have you thought of the possibilities in life? whether you account it to fate, life, destiny, choices.i mean, sometimes looking back and thinking about the decisions you made and choices you chose, what was going through your mind when you made such a decision? in what state of mind were you in? why did you think the way you thought?

and then i back tracked a little through my life and i wonder what would have happened should i have taken the other way, or bravely stepped out of my comfort zone into something else?

- if i chose gmss instead of sacss for a secondary education
- if i didnt choose my cca i was in
- if i went into np's product and design for poly
- if i didnt heed the dumb advisory's advice and stuck with business IT as an appeal choice
- if i never stepped into IT school at all. woah the thought of not knowing the 3 of them and maybe just randomly walking past them or even gossiping about them is a horrid thought.
- if i actively joined smth in poly
- if i talked to more ppl in class
- if i never chose sim
- if i chose uol
- if i went for my orientation
- if i joined smth in sim. technically speaking i can still join, but the chances are like negative.

well, that's all i can think of for now, things that i didnt really understand my decisions and what was i thinking at that point of time. and what would have taken place if i chose the other way out. the people i would come across, the people i would have missed. so far the people that i've met and are friends with, are great. well, for all you know, it could have been better, or more positively, worse.

i dont know, but sometimes thinking of the endless possibilities makes everything appear just a little more interesting. although amanda pointed out that there's no use thinking about it. but im really just a person who constantly feel that the grass will always be greener and longer and better on the other side.

and i guess sometimes miracles do happen. it's just that at that point of time we failed to recognise it. or took them for granted. but when you look back, it's amazing how sometimes things just fall into place like that, if not, eventually it passes and things, people, you thought you couldnt forget or deal with losing, just get blown away with time, or quietly tucked into a corner of your brain you might occassionally think about and forget and get reminded again. and when everytime you recall it, a bit of it just chips off and then the incident slowly reduces to a blur and so distant you wonder if it ever took place at all.

oh well. i know i repeated alot of words and dont really know if i make sense. im random and incoherrent.